Domineering Parent Style (Part 1)

This is going to be part of a 3-blog series about parenting styles.  Over the last couple of years people around me have been becoming parents and I have seen so many different parenting styles.  Over the last four months I have finally understood these parenting styles firsthand.

The first type I see is the “domineering mother.”  The mother that spends hours reading on the Internet, buys every book that was ever made for parenting, and runs around like a chicken with their head cut off.

I know a few mothers like this (by the way I am not saying any parenting style is better than another!) and they spent 9 long months eating only certain foods because they were better for the baby.  I would be drinking caffeine (which my doctor had said was okay in control amounts) and they yelled at me telling me I was harming my baby.

They don’t give their children pacifiers because it interacts with breastfeeding, or allow individuals around their child because they have had all the recommend vaccines ever made.

I have noticed that sometimes it is harder to talk to these mothers because they think their way of parenting is the best way therefore the only way.

I am all for reading up on parenting and learning what I can from experienced people but I do not spend every waking moment reading the internet and books because bottom line is you may be a parent but you are not a parent to my child and the truth is every child is different.

Also to me it seems that these moms are so stressed out because they are so unwilling to take help from others, fearing that others might not do it the way the books say.

I wonder if you are a domineering parent with your child if you will be with your child, or does your parenting style change?  Does your parenting style change as your child changes?  Is the extra stress worth it?  What are your takes?   Are you a parent like this?

This is not my parenting style, as of now, maybe because I am so overwhelmed with work and school, or maybe because I was raised in a different style?  Either way I am curious to hear from domineering parents why they chose this style.  Please share your thoughts!


6 responses to “Domineering Parent Style (Part 1)

  • Brittany

    Although I am not a parent yet, I know exactly what type of personality you are talking about. The fact of the matter is, they aren’t raising your baby… and you are doing a great job at that 🙂 Besides, books and the internet really can’t tell you everything. I think everybody does what feels right for them, and definitely agree that parenting style changes with the child. I know my mom raised all 3 of us rather differently based on our personalities and needs. Sometimes you really need to just rely on your motherly instincts and your heart. Definitely take the advice from those who have done it before you (perhaps sometimes with a grain of salt haha). I know I will be coming to you, my dear friend, when I have children of my own!

  • jessplassmeyer

    Britt – thanks for reading and the feedback! Growing up I used to think that my mom wasn’t being fair because she raised my sister and I different but now as a parent I am starting to see you have to parent to accomidate your child, and each child of yours might need different parenting! I can’t wait till you have beautiful babies and know I am always here to help and support you the way you support me!! 🙂

  • Jessica

    I don’t think I’m a domineering parent. I rarely read parenting books and I can be kind of lazy sometimes with my kids – do what you want as long as it doesn’t hurt something. But…I never gave my kids pacifiers because those things drive me crazy. But I don’t tell other people not to give them to their kids.

  • jessplassmeyer

    Jessica – Thanks for the advice (as always) sometimes I feel like a bad parent because I am not spending my days doing research on the internet and reading the latest books but bottom line is I am exhausted from life and any and all free time I get I want to spend with my baby not researching how I should be spending the time with him! And I am with you on the pacys thing, my baby only gets it very rarely and on those occassions he doesn’t take it for more than a min or two.

  • liz

    I would say that I’m somewhere in the middle. I think it’s easier to feel more comfortable avoiding “the books” as your first child gets older and then completely with Baby #2 and beyond.

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